heh, tired as fuck, and has weird thoughts that he wants too write down! ><

Okay now, I haven't been sleeping for 25 1/2 hours. I'm totally going to crush every part of my self worth, so that people, today/Tomorrow, laughs at me.

First of all, Since I haven't been able to get any sleep, I'm going to fuck up your chance to measure me as anything worthy of being called human:
I'm feeling like a retard on speed, and I haven't been screwing with any other pills than Caffeine pills (I think), which have given me energy to stay awake for the last 7 hours. I've been ridicoulusly close to being completely dead though, since I've made stupid comments through all night long, + I've tried painting people in the face and have worn the ugliest costume ever, why people haven't killed me yet, is a miracle.

Why my social life drives me insane from time to time:
It drives me insane, I can't do something creative, I love to have friends though, I love to have a girlfriend. I just don't know why I sometimes just want to stay inside and forget that everything exists, even myself, for a few minutes. I want to discover peace. When you discover peace, I believe you're mostly alone, in your own world, which is empty, and has no sounds and a Dim light. I want to see that world, in my own living world, without anyone disturbing my silence, anywhere.

I've figured that in that world your connection to other people stay through there. In my head though, there is others sometimes joining in, that can be a girlfriend(In my case Kelsey), or my closest friend.

The strange thing though, is that it is never invaded by two people at the same time, Kelsey comes alone, we only talk a lot, we don't need to kiss or have sex, and I still love it, every minute. This really calms me down and makes me enjoy everything. Relaxation that makes me forget about any worries of my normal outside life.

sometimes though, a friend of mine joins, that person just sits down, and plays the xbox with me, or comes up with cool ideas toghether with me or plainly just talks with me funny or not funny. That person maybe eat a pizza with me or comes for a sleepover, and we talk a lot, perverted jokes come up, we talk about our Gf/Bf. I will now tell you, that this friend, is my most awesome friend of all time, I've got so many close friends I don't want to decide who's my best friend. this friend, has got a piece of all of them in it. C.K's charisma, Katrine's pervertedness, Geir's Creativity, Hallvards humour, Daniel's(my cous) feelings, Jørgen's calm, Martin's honesty... My friends are totally awesome ><
They techincally all from time to time visit me in this world.

But the last thing in this world
which is at level with the two others from time to time, is that of when I am tired, and alone, like now, my world is actually now filled with sleeping kids and a mom at a comp, but besides my mom, everything is quiet, but she only clicks the computer so almost. When I came home, and jumped into the sofa, nothing struck me as needed to be done, and nothing struck me as a worry, for tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow.

But later this day I will get worry... now, later has happened (Fuck, SCHOOL).
When I start thinking about that, I lose my relaxing and start to stress